Disconsolateness

 Memories should not be a prison.

What is it with IT people, developer to be exact and their communication ways? I've talked and work with so many people with so many different background and Ya Allah kalau nak communicate dgn orang IT lah paling payah sekali. Jenuh lah. I am currently doing a 6-figure project kalau semua simple issue pun susah sangat nak communicate mmg ranap lah project ni. I notice I constantly have the same issues with IT based people. Mesti susah sangat nak communicate and very hard to understand how they process information. Benda simple simple pun depa susah sangat nak faham so Im guessing maybe it's me yang need to learn how to communicate better with them? I know their brain works 10101010 and not like others yang can be 11001010 etc but damnnn Im actually struggling to communicate with them bila ada issue arises. Kadang kadang benda simple pun need few hours nak explain??? FEW HOURS. That is such a waste of time Ya Allah. With that few hours I can utilize it on to so many other stuff

It's my first raya without you. Biasanya mesti perg ipoh and you loved my begedil. I miss your cooking. I miss all the food you cooked me everytime I come by. Sometimes, I'll stay the night there. Rindu. Rindu sangat dkt Mak Siah. Rindu sangat sangat.

I miss my Mak Siah a little bit extra today. She loves my food. Shes the reason why I love food in the first place. Every year, she would wait for me to come and cook for her. I miss her. So so so so much. She may not be my biological mother but she treats me like one. I miss her, extra hard this raya. Al Fatihah to you Mak Siah. Everytime I try new food, your face always pops up in my mind because you taught me to always try new food and dont be afraid. I miss you. Im not the nicest person out here and I am definitely a sinner so I might not see you there. I dont think theres room for me up in Jannah Mak Siah :/ I pray for you everyday. Moga semua doa dan amalan Ain dkt sini, Ain dapat bagi dkt Mak Siah juga dekat sana. I miss you so much it hurts. 

 Yoooo having GERD and constantly vomiting whilst having to cook on the first night of eid IS NO FUNNN

You know what always motivate and drives me? Seeing hardworking people. People often say things like "Kerja bagai nak rak buat apa?", "kerja sampai tengah tengah malam usaha beria bagai buat susah kan diri je buat apa?" and etc but for me, I look highly to those who work so hard in their life.  No matter if you're young or a mother, I hold immense respect for all. Yet, for mothers, my admiration deepens. The role of a mother isn't one everyone can fulfill. The sacrifices made, whether it's personal time or rest, elevate you to an unparalleled level. Such dedication deserves the highest respect and honor.  Seeing people who stay up late and still work just drives me to be more hardworking myself. Though I still get worried and concerned seeing people who don't have enough rest, it's still something that I actually look up to. I guess my concern and worrying mostly comes from how I know my body will react. I used to not sleep for 3 days straight an